Loose Ends

  Keeping up with friends isn't easy in my current situation. I want so badly to have a binge day of catching up on everyone's blogs and browsing new patterns! Until I can find the time to do that again, I've made a goal to try to post something here once a week to keep me motivated... Well, this past week sure has been "something", but not much crochet is getting finished.

  I started a scarf during Hurricane Irma. It was meant to be a free pattern, but there's too many loose ends to deal with right now. (No, no... Not in the scarf, but in life itself.) As we watched the water rise around us, while we listened to the wind rip the shingles off Dad's roof, and the whole time wondered if we would have anything to return to, I crocheted to keep calm. When the cleanup began after the storm, the project suffered some neglect.
 

  I began other projects, and this scarf became buried under a pile of half-finished things. The good news is that I found the project with its hook still attached. Progress resumes amid frustration with the other work I started. The bad news... If I wrote down a pattern, I can't find it now! My yarn is in tangled piles, those other projects just won't come together the way I want, and I feel like I just need to finish something or give it up already. So instead of becoming irritated with counting more stitches in another unfinished item, I decided to complete the scarf with a round of plain double crochet:

  I like it, though I feel like that plain border is a form of "giving up". But perhaps it's all those loose ends in life that are aggravating me the most... As I sit on Dad's couch which is covered in the Big Huge Afghan (which produced the scraps that are making this scarf), I can look at some of my best work and know I'm no failure. I just feel like I should be doing something else right now.

  It's always good to be able to understand what is really bothering you, and to differentiate between it and the smaller issues that build under the weight of the big problem. I've come to a point where I'm almost ready to give up on crochet, but unfinished projects are not the real cause of all this stress! 

  Applying for help with FEMA has been a roller coaster ride. The low-interest loan we qualified for through the program is a start, but I think their amount is a joke if we're supposed to use it to rebuild our lives. Any chance I've had at a free day has been spent meeting another inspector at the house that's an hour away from where we're staying, or filling out more forms to get that loan. There's still our home full of our moldy belongings to clean out, the car to sell, and cats to find homes for. The one thing that hasn't changed is the constant pile of Rip's laundry needing to be done. No, it's not my crochet that is causing this meltdown in my brain... It's too many roadblocks stopping life from progressing that turns one missed stitch into a major disaster in my mind.

  To decompress, I've turned to my old hobby of photography. I've wanted to experiment with long-exposure shots in the dark ever since getting the new camera. I have also been meaning to try out a better photo editing program, plus expand this blog into more than just crochet... So I finally did a little of it all:

  On the bright side, I'm learning I have a talent for taking some interesting photos in complete darkness. What's not so great is my skill to make them better with that new editing program. Above, I managed to turn a plain picture of the harvest moon into an amateur's artsy painting. Below, I edited a different photo of that same moon into... Something.

  Those were both done before I realized that I was trying too hard, attempting to take a long-exposure shot of a light source ( the moon) in the dark. What I needed was a simple, balanced, dark picture to get what I wanted...

  And BOOM! I have that awesome shot that looks like the stars are out in the daytime. This is the kind of photography that can get me as excited as a new yarn at the craft store. (And psst... That last one isn't edited for looks; just a re-size and a logo.) So perhaps I need to feed my other talents for a while before I can get back to working seriously on my crochet. Taking pictures doesn't require me to keep count, untangle, or record stitches. It just feels good to look through the lens and capture my vision of the world. But first, there's some loose ends to deal with...

  Seriously, this time I mean those yarn ends! This morning we woke up to lows in the upper 30's. I know I do this every year, but... Don't I live in Florida??? Where did summer go? I want it back; it's too cold!!! Okay, I'll stop complaining and go finish that scarf now. I will need it if I'm going to be out at night taking more of those awesome pictures.

Happy Crocheting!

PS - In the meantime, I can stick to snapping shots of this amazing view every time I have to go back to the old house. 😃