Thursday, March 16, 2017


  No, that's not the usual use of the WTF acronym, but my WIP's are still works in progress... I'm "waiting to fmelt". It's been a while since I've made a project doing this, so many of you have no clue what I'm talking about. "Fmelting" is a word I came up with to describe the hardening of plarn into solid plastic: Felting + melting = Fmelting!

plarn, plastic yarn, crochet, WIP, fmelting

  That explanation sounds like gibberish. Okay, useless non-words aside... If you've ever worked with Perler/fuse beads, this works the same way. (The same, but with plastic yarn that's been crocheted.) You apply heat to the plastic until it fuses together, but there's a fine line between fused and melted through when it comes to more delicate plarn like I'm using. You can get the original tutorial for how to fmelt plarn here.

  I'm waiting to fmelt because I like to have the windows open when I do it, in case of harmful fumes. There doesn't seem to be any, but, you know... Melting plastic. It doesn't smell pretty, either. It's a very minimal smell, but it's a smell nonetheless. I want my windows open, but it's 40° outside. In Florida. In the springtime. Ugh. At least it's not snowing - Yet. Nature went all "WTF" on us (that's Winter To Florida this time).

plarn, plastic yarn, crochet, WIP, fmelting

  I know, I know, get to the point, right? WTF this project is driving me nuts! (Back to Waiting To Fmelt again.) Can you imagine crocheting paper plate holders? I can't believe I'm doing this, but I am. Recycled plastic paper plate holders, so you can recycle while you use more disposable items that will end up in a landfill. It seems a bit contradictory, but it's an idea I've had for a while and I just want to make it.

plarn, plastic yarn, crochet, WIP, fmelting

  This disgusting floppy mess will become a hardened plastic plate holder if all goes well. I made a not-a-mistake on the first design that I'll fix on the rest, so I want to use this not-a-mistake version to test out the fmelting temperature. And I'm trying to figure out if I can make a video during the process with the future versions, but I have horrible lighting in my kitchen. The kitchen is the only place I have a solid surface next to a power outlet for the iron.

plarn, plastic yarn, crochet, WIP, fmelting

  The not-a-mistake was a result of exhaustion. (I've slept about eight hours in the past week...) I had the wrong hook size for the weight of the plarn, and the work was bunching up with six multiples in the first round. I thought it would be neat to keep the density of the stitches by removing a multiple. And that left me turning a pentagon into a circle, which I did. But the pattern turns out harder to work in the end.

  I think I'll still keep the same hook size, and go back to the multiple of six. The ruffle can be worked out by increasing less in the following rounds. Being tired makes you think harder than you have to sometimes. Wouldn't it be so much easier to work a few rounds the same, with no increases at all? Then you're not stuck with a pattern of "increase here, don't increase there; Do it in a different order the next round". Just simple granny stitch simplicity.

  WTF. (Well, time flies.) I meant to try to go to bed tonight, but I spent too much time working on another project. Here it's three in the morning and Rip will have to be awoken from his slumber soon. I might as well stay up - Two alarm clocks and a phone won't wake him up. On that note - I'll leave you with a story about a Rip-snoring-3a.m. time I really was saying the typical usage of WTF:

  This was years ago and proves he hasn't changed... We had installed new fire alarms in the house prior to the incident. Maybe three or four days afterward, I bolted out of bed at 3 a.m. to the sound of a screeching alarm that also talks: Warning, warning; fire, fire. And Rip just snores away in bed.

Me: There's a fire, get up, get up!


Me: Get up! *shakes him* Get up! *kicks the bed* Get UP!

Him: (As the alarm is still screeching) Huh? WTF?

Me: WTF indeed! There's a fire, now get UP!

Him: What makes you think there's a fire?

Me: The FIRE alarm is going off; the house is on FIRE!

Him: No it's not. *rolls over* *snores*

Me: WTF.

  The house was never on fire. Every time you change the batteries (or install the new alarm), you have to run it through a test. If you don't, the things go off sometime when they decide to self-test themselves. I guess it figures a few days later at 3 a.m. is a great time to test your survival skills. As for me, I've put up with his symphony of alarms for long enough that I no longer bolt out of bed at every single noise. (I just never sleep now.) Rip van Winkle ten years later: Still snoring strong.

Happy Crocheting!

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